Monday, October 30, 2006

damn i hav to go home now
am bored. im in comm lab now. i feel so urgh
i feel so happi n sad at the same time
graduation camp is cuming n ill miss all mi frens man
i dunno wat ill do when its time to say my goodbyes
ok, im going to trite my dedications
sometimes i feel so down lik now. wtf
i feel lik a fool
i feel betrayed
i feel uglii
i feel lik one pathetic slut
i hate myself sometimes
my looks n everything else
but i cant do anything
how do i like myself
i simplii dunno
how can i stop this stupid bitch frm addin all mi frens again after her lame damn sorri
i simplii dunno wat to do

Sunday, October 29, 2006

im bored
in com lab now. my dedications all gone. ok la not realli. haha, CAMP IS SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!
ok, my dedications appeared so have a thousand more to rite
whoohoo! my dedications came out after all! i stil have alot to rite to all my awesome frens!whoo hoo!
ai, something's weird, my dedications came out after all! haha! im sorri to all my other frens who i havent ritten dedications to. im realli sorry. i lik promise ill rite them another day cause im tired. sorri!
ok, somethings rong, i rote all my dedicatons to all my frens on my blog, n there was an error and now all my dedications r lik GONE!wtf,im so sori to all my frens out there. it looks i need my "repair fren".SHERRY!HELP MI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!u noe my pswrd n username.
sherry wong:hi sherry berry! :) thank u 4 being sucha great fren, always supporting mi n neva lettin mi down. thank u so much n i just wanna say god bless u.hope u get into ur desired school.whee!haha, stay chio! :)
livi(hee hee)lim:yo whassup girl! thanks so much 4 always givin mi such great advice.we've failed each other manii times as frens, but i just wanna say thank u.through all our fights, ive learnt 2 treasure frenship more.thanku u n god bless :)
esther lee:hey assss-ther :)HAHA!so lame. although we werent close frens b4 n now, i still dunno whether we r, i just wanna say, u still rock in my eyes. ur basketball skills neva ceased to amze mi n i truly was always motivated to practice my skills until i bcum as gd as u(onli i cant!WA HAHAHAHA!)haha,just stay lik who u r, n stay cool sista,bye :)(n u better bcum more lady lik!dun burp so much!)
sonya goh:we have neva been close frens, but ive always thot u were realli bold. ur bitchiness taught mi lots of things, n tat was to bcum a more brave person instead of crying at evrii little thing.thanks so much.n god bless!:)(b more of the bitchy good hor!haha :) )
annita sze:heys! :) haha, ive always thot u were one stuck up peacock, but just a few weeks ago, u proved mi rong.ure one of the nicest person ive ever met. :) ure humble, n tats one of the qualities everybodii continue to b that way! stay strong n CHIO(N DUN DENY TAT!)god bless :)
vengyan:hi vengyan!hehs, i admit,i used to hate u when u joined bball b4.but im once again rong.ure pretty cool in ur own way. hope u get into the school u want! :) frens until we die ya?HAHA!im so lame at acting cute!(yuck)aniwae, b cool! :)god bless
samsuri:yo bro! whassup! haha, i might hav known u onli recently, but ure pretty cool.wait, not pretty cool, VERII COOL!haha! :) we might not b close pals, but just stay cool! hope u get into unity sec.i heard their rugby is damn good.hehs, k la, bye bro
jolynn khoo:yoyo, we might not b hangin out now, n we might not lik each other verii much, but i just want u to noe i thank u verii much 4 bein my pal since i met u i n bbal.haha,i noe ure tryin ur best to change, n i realli appreciate it.just dun lie, k? k la, stay cool. :)
dellysda:yo,whassup! we might not b verii close pals, but i found out that ure damn cool. ure the blogskin QUEEN!!!!!!!!!!n u noe ur style verii well.ur fashion taste is lik wow!haha! :) i mean it! :) just stay chio, n always b urself! :) bye
pierre ong:ok, i dunno whether ull even visit my blog, but ya, thanks 4 being the person i hated in p1 n 2.HAHA!jk! :) ya la, hope ull stay cool.n always b a pierre ong.HAHA!im so lame. k, bye n god bless
glyn tew:we had lots n lots of fights(mainlii cause ive always insulted u!HAHA)but ya, just stay as a great bball player. n hope ull find ur worthy girl. :) k la, bye
gabriel tay:yo!ive neva lik u especialli since the beginning of the year, but i got to see the real u when mi esther jolyn n u had to go the sss tryouts. ure pretty funni, n ya,stay cool. :) hope ull enter a great school,especialli where u can let ur talents(lik runnin fast n ur bbal) shine. haha, always b funni! (wat wassat?) :)
angsana(ang wei cheng):rmbr when i hated u in p2 bcause u were sucha big mouth parrot?!(HAHA)n how i always tripped u? HAHAHAHA!if u do,good.hehs, im so lame. aniwae, i got to noe u better in p5, n ure realli funni(but can u dun b so pervert?????HA!), N ive neva known u were so "charming" until this year.hehs?:) stay cool, n """"charming"""""", n hopefulli find a worthy girlfren. :) hope u excel in ur volleybalL!:)
jerjer(jerome chan):ok, i noe ure pretty scary, n u love to fight, but here's my advice to u.dun b so fierce in secondary school, cause im warning u there r ppl much more fiercer than u n they cn b verii evil.i dunno whether ull listen to my advice, but i hope u do.aniwae, just wanted to say,ur sports totalli ROCKS!haha, :) hope u do well in ur secondary school. :) n god bless.(n u better treat her well!or ill server ties with u!WAHAHAHA!ok, im so lame haha,jus stay cool)
eunice ong:yoyoyo!yupp, we hated each other frm p3 to p5 but, ya, ure actualli not bad. ure Bitchy in a verii good way(especiali when u bitch those freaks in our class!wahahahaha!!!!:) )aniwae, i totalli love ur fashion taste, it like rules, n i dunno how u do it, but u somehow always direct mi to such cool places!must b ur talent!HAHA!:) aniwae, stay cool n god bless! :) (treasure him hor! :) )

Thursday, October 26, 2006

ok, here it is:

I walk a lonely road
The only one I that have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Were the city sleeps
I'm the only one and i walk alone

I walk alone i walk alone
i walk alone i walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow's heart the only that's beating
Sometimes i wish someone out there will find me
'Til then i"ll walk alone

Oh-Oh Oh-Oh Oh-Oh
Oh-Oh Oh-Oh Oh-Oh

I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line of the edge
And where I walk alone

Read between the lines
What's fucked up and everything's all right
Check my vital signs to know I'm still alive
And I walk alone, I walk alone, I walk aloneI walk alone, I walk a...

*ok, than its a repat, n im too lazy to type animore. ADDICTED TO THE SONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 WHOO HOO!
wa,i saw livi'a "graduation post", it gave mi an idea.
this are the lyrics 4 vitamin's c graduation song

And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day
Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night in June I didn't know much of love
But it came too soonAnd there was me and you
And then we got real cool
Stay at home talking on the telephone with me
We'd get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels

As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever

So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can we ever find a job that won't interfere with a tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
And this is how it feels
*repeat chorus*

La, la, la, la…
Yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la…
We will still be friends forever
Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this townI keep,
I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
*repeat chorus(x3)

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

wa lau, evrybodii go madtv at !!!!!!!!no wait, dun put madtv, put "bunifa" man, ull people will laugh ur butt s off when u see the videos! HAHA! ok im so lame. im just so down n bored. lalalala. lame shit. k la, im loggin off. bye
wa, now listenin to shayne's ward "no promises" man, it suits my mood. my "bro" tim told mi sometimes its hard to let go, but u hav to. n im gonna listen to him. im through with that "guy" i used to lik so much.

Monday, October 23, 2006

lalala, im addicted to green day's song
hey hey hey ppl. just came back frm lot one's library. went with sonn esther lee n livia. blah blah. sighs, speakin of my frens, as the end of the year nears, my heart is lik one big butterfly. ill b going to a new school, n most likely without my frens. wat am i going to do without my frens? u noe, the crowd, sherri, geraldine, livia, sonn, esther lee n koh, geraldine te, venus, siu yi, n so manii more. im gonna miss them lik crazy. n not just tat, wat sec school will i go?????????? im such a liar. when my mom asked mi if i was ok bcause i didnt get into singapore sports school, i was lik yaya, im fine la. sh. but inside my heart i was lik, stupid, stupid, why i neva get chosen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!SO UNFAIR! n now my onli hope is tat i can go to cedar. but when i tink about how my maths will sure pull my results down, i feel this freakin pang. if i cant go into sss n cedar, where else can i go? something in mi tells mi im going to kranji sec, N I DUN WANT TO!not that kranji sec is bad or anything, but there's no track n field!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!how 2 go? eeyear. argh.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

i love PRINCESS HOURS!!!!!!!!!

sometimes its realli hard to please everybodii. frm teachers to parents n to frens.but the most trying is way r they bad or anything, they seriouslii rock. but what happens if one or two doesnt get along???tats what happeniin 2 mi.
ya see, i hav this fren j. she's a liar, a flirt n etc. nobodii likes her right now. i was angrii with her 4 one moment, but then my anger slowlii dissapeared. i wanted to b the fren that stuck with her through thick n thin times, but i just couldnt. my parents forbidded her to b with her cause of her past attitude. when she ran away frm home, they were furious, n if i was eva caught with her, i would b in big trouble. n my other frens, they dun lik her. n yeah, im a coward, i dun want to anger them by bfrendin j. n i dunno what god wants mi to do.its time to seriousllii do sum soul seachin, cause right now im confused. wat should i do? j realli wants to change. but how would i noe if she was lying? n will i lose my parents' trust n my other frenships while bfrendin j?i dunno wat to do. i might behave lik aslutty bitch most of the times, but i noe somewhere inside mi, i still hav tat stupid compassion hidden , n i seriouslii dunno wat to do with it. i cannot stand to see people hurt, but my selfish side doesnt want mi 2 loose all my other frens. haiz. i hate this.
yo people whassup. listenin to green day, n their music is lik WOW!haha. so lame. man, i wonder sometimes if im not mi, what kind of person would i b????? i realli wish n wish tat sometimes i could b like other ppl. u noe wat i mean?
sumtimes i want 2 have sonya's bitchiness(its a good thing) so no one can bulli mi.sometimes, i want to b lik esther lee, sporty to the core. or livia, wisdom will bestow mi. sometimes i want to b lik sherry, frenli n attractive.or jolyn(sometimes onli) chattiness. n sometimes i just realli wanna b more outgoing. but i the most i realli want is to b a goood person. a person who is lik damn close to god, a pastor u noe. n i want to b a fren always there 4 everyone.just a realli realli nice person. a person with a heart of gold. but sometimes in this its realli difficult.4 a example, lets say if one fren tells mi bad stuff bout another fren, i just get tongue tied. im lik, what should i say??? tats right, n its so frustratin. yupp, n sumtimes, i just can b pure evil. im totalli serious. n when i regert, its too late. so i hope one day i can b the person who is compassionate. its hidden sumwhere inside mi. somewhere verri deep. n i noe if i try, it will be cum out. i noe. someday......................

Saturday, October 21, 2006

im so sian im so sian

Friday, October 20, 2006

man, so long havent bllog alreadii.sian.wa, but the one week hoiliday was a blast!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
went to sonn's house n HOG THE COMM!
play taiti, n always had laughin fits! went to cut hair(thank u sonn 4 sponsorin the money,thanku(X100000)
enjoyin life.
lovin everyday.
man, i seriousliiiii love my pals.
ok, im so lame

Sunday, October 15, 2006

how do u feel when u realli want the person to b there, the person who uve known, but neva talked to, n he wont appear.


when when when when will i see him again in person

why didnt i go n talk to him.............

why he so shy also
complicated stuff

Saturday, October 14, 2006

ok, sighs, im NOT sorri!WHA HAHAHAHAHA!but ive cooled down alreadii
ok, im going to cool down. this is to that girl who added SO MANI of my friendster frens. u r so dead................I CANT CALM DOWN !]
bloody bloody bloody BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!DUN ADD ALL MY FRENS LA, U SO DESPO, GO ADD OTHER PPL'S FREN LA! STUPID BITCH.
im rite now going to apologise to sherri bcause i suddenli now feel the same way when u thot L added all ur frens. im sorri tat i didnt support u. cause a certain BITCH ADDED ALLLLLLLLLL MY FRENS.THANKS SO MUCH BITCH!
hey, bad luck doesnt REALLI happen u noe.
2nd situation.
what do u do when u hav to decide between a verii close fren n ur own parents?
i seriouslii dunno wat i should b doing now cause the same situation is happenin to parents dun wan mi to mix with j. they think shes a bad influence on mi, which is kinda......true. n until her attitude changes, they wont let mi near her. i feel so bad. i noe i should honour my parents, but its so difficult. i admit, even though sumtimes...ok, most of the times...j's attitude sucks, i find tat she is fun to b with. not manii people likes her now, n im followin them. im sorri j. but i hav to respect my parents. of course i can talk to u, but......ull probably find mi quite cold towards u most of the times. sighs. i feel realli mean. i FEEL MEAN!!!!!!!urgh.can somebodii out there tell mi WAT TO DO?????????

Friday, October 13, 2006

ok, first, im gonna apologise 4 not ritin in my blog.
ok, now, down to serious businesss.
my 1st situation
i hav this 3 reali awesome pals tat hav been with mi 4 lik four years. they r realli amazing people, n nobodii can replace this frenship bond. but now, s ng g fighting with l n although i didnt noe whose side to take on last time,i sure do now. im taking BOTH SIDES. i dunno how this fight happened, buti i sure noe wats standin in our freakin way.misunderstandin n frustration. s assumed tat l added all her frens, but she was rong. l told mi tat she onli added her frens bcause they viewed her, if not she wouldnt hav dreamed of addin s frens, n l isnt the type of person to lie. this is where s is rong. but s is frustrated that l keeps copying her, which is true, cause i hav seen it b4. l, this time, u r rong. i noe i sound rude n harsh n etc, but i cannot bare to see two great pals like u two fightiin. i noe i was realli happi tat finalli l could feel the pain n how it feels to b backstabbed so painfulli,but my good side took over tat evil mi. so im going to apologise to her.sorri l.but l, most of the times its good to b original. originality is awesome, n i tell u, u will gain lots of ppl's admire. no kiddin.:) now s, sometimes its good to b understandin, n forgivin.but something else is better, sometimes its great to b the first one to apologise. no way, it dosent make u look lik a pathtic person, uh-uh. in fact, a simple sorri shows tat this person is a humble n great leader. go check up the bible. :) also s, i want to apologise to u 4 bein such a wimp fren, for being a coward to tell u tat sometimes u r rong. im not realli a true fren, cause a true fren will always hav those qualities. im sorri.

about the shoppin trip, i found out that there's a misunderstandin between all of u. so s n l, i do hope u two will work on tat.cuase if u do, this whole figth will b cleared up:) haha, i wont b ritin the trip in my blog, cause its confidential.
i hope u two will become frens again. im totalli serious.god bless the both of u. n g too!

urgh,so complicating. i need a drink.
ps:ill b ritin later about wat happened in the second situation. n its about another person

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

today something happened to mi. i didnt noe what exactly happened, but it just happened. i suddenlii bcame realli depressed after schl today. i was also so tired.
i started thinkin about everybodii just all of a sudden. all my frens came to my mind.they just came.i thot about the fights we had this year n i wanted to scream.dunno what happen! i thot about the gd times, frm p3to p6 n i was so engrossed in my thots. i also suddenli felt like crying.i noe, its sissy. i hate to cry, cause i find it makes mi look lik a wimp.but the damn tears just threatened to flow. i also thot about somebody i missed a lot. i wanted that person to appear b4 mi. i just wanted . i could feel myself gettin so depressed!n then i thot about yesterday, n i could feel mixed emotions. i dunno why.all the emotions just filled mi. i thot about besides being with my awesome frens yesterday, the whole trip was a downfall. i failed to entertain my new fren. n i felt dumb, stupid n humilated. but at least i had sher, geraldine n pierre. they were cool, n they still r. my thots then drifted to my looks.a voice suddenly filled my brain n it said,"u r downright ugli.u r ugli i r so ugli."the voice just kept repeating,taunting mi. my confidence level went down n down n down.n the voice grew louder n louder in my brain. it took all the effort just not to let a single freakin tear drop. i wanted to go home, hide in bed n cry.the voice suddenli changed. n it said this time,"u faker! u fake christian!u fake fake fake fake!ure not as holy as u tink!"i was paralysed. n i new, tat the voice was correct. i had unwittinly backslided. i let material things b the no. one in my life. i wanted to cry! i hated that voice!i thot about god.he was such a loving father,but i hav neva treasured him.
my mind wandered b wandered.
i had to drag myself home.
i dunno what happened. but all i can say is
jesus, im cuming bac to u.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

stop copying mi la n sherri too!!!!!!!!!

to an anonymous girl from me&sherry.

Monday, October 09, 2006

wtf. finalli finished my stupid blog!
wow! record.i hav been on comm for 4 hours! the comm's gonna explode! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
siao! haha
im like so freakin happi!after one month of stupid torture, i can finalli b set FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
ok. i so have to catch up on everything i missed.
1)i have to go running everyday cause all the stupid stress made me gain extra pounds!
2)practise my bball,ALONE!dun want any comments frm the sidelines.HAHA!
3)catch up on all the girly gossips
4)hold a PARTAY!
5)save up for chiristmas
6)give all my friendster frens their testimonials(i actualli owe them all ten each.-sheepish grin-)
7)practise my xbox skills!im the queen of electronic games!WHA HAHAHAHAA!(HOW LIAN)
8)post everyday on my blog
11)catch up on all the korean dramas n taiwan dramas i missed(that is, buy the whole series!)
12)buy new clothes frm IP ZONE!WHOO HOO!
13)ask eunice ong where she gets all her damn freakin cool accesories!
14)watch finish ALL my dvds(except those sappy ones.urgh)
15)spend more time with my frens!(sher,liv,esther lee,jolynn,jerome,geraldine tee n lim,siu yi,wei cheng,venus,ETC)
16)buy finish my anime comic!(slam dunk)
17)buy shoes frm converse(ya rite, lik i hav the money!HAHA!)
19)go to ppl's house EVERYDAY
20)n the top priority on my list is to spend more time with God!!!!!

haha! lets see how manii i can accomplish!tata!